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"stepping out on my own"
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Vodka, our beloved dog

The loss of someone special always warrants a blog post, as is my case with writing as my tool in the process of healing.

As always, I think - what if? What if I hadn't chased him out of the room? What if I had opened to door? What if... what if...

The last thing I did to him was to chase him out. Guilt really consumes me - he only wanted to be close to us in his last moments, yet all I could think about was how his fur would get on the bed, how he might step on my bruises. Now all these things seem so trivial. I would have given him the entire bed if I had another chance.

Being in the house with him gone is really difficult. Everywhere I look I am reminded of him. The tuft of fur which signals his existence, the emptiness when I look into the toilets, the lack of him in front of the fan.

I miss him snuggling into us on the bed, stepping all over us, 'accidentally' stepping on our toes, his warm body as I snuggle into his fur, seeing him cuddled in a corner of the toilet, seeing him waiting for food as we cook, him licking our faces as we wake up, him lying by the water bowl with his 'chicken wing' front legs, his friendly 'hello' howl, his adorable face as I open the door, his excited face as we pick up his leash to prepare him for a walk, the clicking that his nails make on the floor as he walks around.

The house is quiet without him. Too quiet. Even Kino lays in a corner, dejected and bored.

He was a wonderful gift to us - a newly wed couple who shared their first home with their first dog - a lovely friend, buddy and comrade to us all. He was always there for us. If only he could be here again, and never leave us.

A gentle giant, a gentleman who always let Kino have her way.

We miss you, Vodka and we love you so much. We'll never forget you. Thank you so much for having been with us. You have brought us so much joy.

I'm thankful for all who turned up yesterday to say their last goodbyes to the best dog ever. He was really one of a kind and knowing that he made an impact on the lives of so many others who care so much for him helped.

Here's the last video taken of Vodka by Justin. Thanks so much Justin for being there and all that you have done for us, and Vodka.



Sunday, May 24, 2009
Mr Vodka

"Please sign here, sir."

Signing documents makes a doggie sleepy...




"Whew! Finally all done!"




Thursday, May 21, 2009
TV Girl!

Caught the final episode of Desperate Housewives and it's really quite interesting, yet not as exciting as previous seasons' endings. But there's one thing in the episode which really bugs and irritates me - who is that woman in the wedding gown??? Gee... they really do know how to keep us in suspense.

Gossip Girls on the other hand, is getting kinda boring. Season finales aren't all that exciting, and the affairs of the heart are getting boring, with Nate shuffling from one to the other (always the same girls), Blair and Chuck on their endless "tell me you love me" squabble (though the season does resolve something for them) and Serena and Dan on their almost incestuous relationship which lasted way too short and was revived for no apparent reason (which also explains its abrupt death for a second time).

And as for Ugly Betty, I just love watching it for the colourful visuals and Amanda's superb bimboness! Though the story does get exciting in the middle of the season, it sizzles out towards the end.

And yes, I'm guessing you now know my itenerary for the past few days.

Monday, May 18, 2009
Insomnia is not just a song

Being awake at night is not as devastating as being awake in the day. At least when you're alone and have no one to do things with, it's not because you don't have people to turn t0, it's because they're all sleeping. No excuses, no reasons. Just a fact of life that we can't debate against. I like the certainty and lack of loserdom of that.

Sunday, May 17, 2009
The carnivores continue to cook and devour


The prata look-alike rossti


Steaks with wine - sans sauce



Here's our meal complete with mushroom sauce














Pink meat - my fav!

M&S Sauce = yummy steak!

Lunch - compliments to my bro!

Some vege lover's probably drooling at the sight of these crunchy broccoli


Pink insides, crunchy on the outside = yummy steak




Here's the sauce that made it oh-so-super-yummy!



Take note of the mountain of rosti on the plate in the background - that's my plate. Full to the max after the meal.



A closer view of my giant portion of meat and potatoes


on a totally random note:
More please!


on another totally unrelated note:

Golden sunlight from the setting sun streaming in from the window amplified by the water. I love sunsets.


Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Mums' Day

Suffering from a hangover, Dan and I dragged ourselves out of bed and headed to River View Hotel for Mums' Day celebratory lunch with my family.

Just a note - buffet after a late night of drinking is a terrible idea. Result? No appetite, dizzy spells, over-feeding which results in puke. Damn. And I really hate puking, but it was either that or feel totally sick for the rest of the day.


The siblings

The mom-son duo



The Wongs



The Couple 1



The couple 2




On an entirely different note, did something that I never ever thought I would actually do. Not a bad thing, but it really was an experience. True true. Thanks Peter! I love it!! *woof woof*

Oh, and we have discovered a more fun alternative to using cash when playing mahjong - $1 = 1 stroke! SO much more interesting and entertaining! Endless fun bullying people with seemingly harmless eyebrow pencils and eye liners. Jenga's a good way to get some face art too!

Our 4 victims were repainted by us - an Ah Beng with a black eye, chef with mustache, kitty cat kid and kitty cat gal. Too bad I don't have the pics to show... but I think they would kill me if I did post any anyways.

Saturday, May 09, 2009

I'm increasingly more of a fan of Aerosmith ever since I've been playing Guitar Hero: Aerosmith on PS3. The songs are so... oomph! Love the guitar solo parts too... Joe Perry is superb, man! Although I nearly wished him dead when I had to play against 'him' to advance in the game.


Super in awe of actual guitar players - those who can move their fingers so much faster than my eyes can see!


Been watching Dan play Resident Evil 5 as well. The graphics are superb!! It's like playing a movie character rather than a game character. Amazing! Plus, totally thrilling to watch too. Too much of a coward to play myself but it's fun enough to just watch!

I guess that sums up my holidays. PS3 rocks!!!