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"stepping out on my own"




Thursday, March 23, 2006
Shitty day

When you are faced with referees as such, displaying such blatant biasness and unfairness, what can you do but scream in anger and angst.

Even as a spectator, I could barely control my temper while watching the match. Forget the fouls that were not called, forget the fouls that shouldn't have been called, but when you give out 3 technical fouls in a row without proper justification, what else is it but unfairness and subjective refereeing?

Is it wrong for a player to enquire on whether that foul was called and whether it's a free throw? With a simple question as such, does it really warrent a technical foul? With such an outrageous and lurid call, what can the player do but burst out in anger? Even the spectators couldn't take it down, booing when Michael was taking the free throws... the 6 free throws resulting from the technical calls.

How can a referee, who is supposed to judge and make the calls on all fairness and with an objective view, make such unbased calls and manipulate their authority in a match like that? What they do directly affects the game - they can be the deciding factor as to which team wins or loses. And when they play the cards as such, calling on calls based on their own temperment and contentment, how can a player give it his all, when no matter how much hard work he puts in, it all doesn't matter cos the referee's siding with the opposition?

You can't blame the opposition for such a thing - the only thing you can blame is the fucked up system where fucking arseholes who abuse their authority and take the joy out of competitive sports. How can a player, in all fairness, play their best and be sportsmanly when such the referees just blatantly side with one team? This is the reason why Singapore's basketball will forever be stuck at this level, and never improve. With referees as such, what the fuck can they do when all the players' morality has been demolished, their urge to do their best to win been dampened by the bad refereeing of a match? And this isn't the first time - when people suggest getting cameras to catch the calls and rectify the bad calls, they just object, with no proper reason. The only reason why I can think of them doing so is because they are scared - they know what they're doing and they want to keep it that way, with them dominating and doing all that they want.

All I can say is, with a fucked up system like this, it's no wonder the sport is still at this standard after all these years, unable to gain the popularity that other sports in Singapore has garnered, such as soccer, swimming and table tennis. You can set up a fucked up system and maintain it for your own benefits, but for all the dreams and ideals, morale and determination of the players that they have demolished, is it worth it? You are doing nothing but dragging all these would be talented and wonderful players down with your faulty system. We should always look to improving the game, improving our nation and our people through sports as well, but when such politics play an immense role in something as simple as a basketball match, it makes one wonder about the system and about how things are always controlled by those in power, while the powerless main players can do nothing to improve the situation, and get sucked into this never-ending cycle.

This has just further convinced myself to leave this unjust competitive system. Why play when no matter how well you are playing, how hard you train, when you just piss off one referee, he can make you think of murderous thoughts when he decides to take the side of the opposition, squashing all your chances of winning, or even playing your very best. Is this how we want to reflect on our sportsman? Is this how we want to reflect our systems in Singapore? I sincerely hope not, for the benefit of all of us.

Monday, March 20, 2006
V for Vendetta

Today marks my 21st year on this earth. Didn't do much for a celebration, but did eat a lot in celebration.

Went for an international buffet at the City Hall area... somewhere next to National Museum. Food there's great and at $25 per pax for a party of two, I'd say it was a great deal.

Went to watch the match between Tong Whye and SAFSA the next day. A great exhilarating match, but it was nonetheless a victory for Tong Whye. We were all riled up and screaming and cheering on. It was a close game, with the game tied at the end of 40min, going into OT. Some great plays took place, and it was a spectacular match. Ah Liang managed to bank in about 6 out of his 8 shots, all 6 3-pointers. An amazing feat and it was great watching him play again. His steals are still as fast as ever and he managed to lead some great plays in the match.

Had a celebration for my bday after all that. Dan had planned a tiny celebration for me, gathering some pals in batok to meet up under his block for cake. It was sweet of him, planning such a surprise. However, it would have been better if someone didn't let slip on the plan. Haha... let's just say it was a SMS sent too early. But it was a sweet thought, and am really appreciative to all who were present. Thank you darling!

Went to JB today for celebrations today with Dan. Had some food once again... Kenny Rogers and Ajisen Ramen. Yummy food, plus a great movie to top it off. Watched V for Vendetta. An extremely intense but captivating and exciting show - throughly recommend it to all to watch. Great storyline, great effects, great ideas... yeah, "Remember, Remember, November the fifth... "

Thanks darling for spending this weekend with me...

Saturday, March 11, 2006
11 Mar

Finally making her move, this girl has decided to change her life and get herself a new environment to work in, even though she hasn't for sure gotten one yet.

I'm leaving my job as a PR Officer early next month, for nothing in particular. I guess sometimes thinking just flies out the window when the urge to do something arises. So what if I don't have a job lined up yet? I know I have to leave and why am I even waiting for it?

A new prospect may be brewing - went for NIE interview this Wed. The interview was all right, in my view, but of course, who's to say that so many others didn't ace the interview and do even better than me? There's no way I can rest my anxiety till the day I get my acceptance letter. Some pals have commented that I don't really seem like the teaching sort, while others have confirmed and supported me in my choice. Hopefully what I'm doing is right - no one can say for sure, but at least this is really something that I would like to try for. At least the routine will keep me back in check once again.

Need a miracle to learn how to swim now. Fear of water doesn't go well with uncoordinated limbs. I guess it'll take furious practise for me to master the art of swimming now. Hoping and waiting, that's all I can do now with my application. On the other hand, I can now train up on my swimming for a start. Anyone keen to teach, or knows of a great swimming instructor who doesn't charge a bomb, please please please contact me?